Five Ways to Change When Everything is Stuck

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Stuck in a rut

This has been a particularly rough year. Lots of change while at the same time, stagnation. A physical move, career path about face and the first of my baby birds leaving the nest. Many questions have arisen in my mind, no doubt you dear friend get these ponderings too,  the ones where no clear solution is outlined in bold marker. So you ask, where does that leave me or you? Lost? Upset? Mindful? (I know, you love that new catch word) All of these emotions swirling around and my sweet reader, they create stress. I am sure you can relate; we all have stress. We may not all be in the same rowboat, but we are in the same sea.

Sometimes, you need a big upheaving change to move forward and change your circumstances. In some cases, it’s not always possible to change the situation, taking precious time we don’t want to waste to move ahead. The new cushy job hasn’t appeared yet, your story hasn’t been published yet, and maybe you just find it hard to fit into your new neighborhood. It’s now that you need to be strong. Sometimes those around you are down, and they have lost their path. You can be there to support them, especially if it’s someone really close, spouse, child, etc. but remember that you cannot change them. People need to change on their own, as they evolve and find ways to deal with stress and adversity. I know. This stresses you out, and then what good are you to anyone? At the risk of being cliche, and oh so repetitive, change your perspective, or your place, and that can change your attitude. It may even shift your sad other’s attitude. (See Change Your Place, Change Your Luck.)

OK my lovelies, I know you’re wondering what wisdom I have to impart today. Well, let me motivate you right out of the doldrums and into the happy places we all have hidden away. First, I want to say that I believe in you. I also believe that we all create our own little dramas. How we react to ongoing and difficult events in our lives need not be a production of the Royal Shakespeare Company. So now I’m back to my being positive and happy go lucky spiel. Everything in our lives can have a silver lining, if you look in the right place. Still feeling lost, clueless? Me too, most of the time. Here are five easy ways to redirect yourself when you’re feeling lost and out of sorts. Hopefully, they can help move you to a more positive and fulfilling life, even if your current situation sucks. Yes ,yes I know – I have ambivalent and obnoxious feelings sometimes too. Mea Culpa.

See the future beans

  1. Change Your Focus. No situation is ever completely hopeless, rather we lose faith and grow hopeless about them. For example, a job hunt. You are talented, overqualified and there a bazillion jobs out there that you can do really well. Success is within your grasp. However, 5 million applications later, you find yourself still unemployed, or worse, in a job you hate that devalues you and your abilities. You begin to doubt yourself. STOP RIGHT NOW! Expend that energy moving forward, stop dwelling and bellyaching. Take a class, even if it’s pottery or glass blowing (I know, sounds cool, right?) do something to expand your horizons, talk to strangers. You never know who might be blowing glass next to you, trying not to sucker in and scorch their throats. Unless it’s dragon, but that would be pretty awesome.  Unlikely, but awesome. Don’t let negative emotions weigh you down. Change your thought patterns, change your reality. Our thoughts create our moods, so go positive and that happy way of thinking might just help build the life you want from the ashes of the glass studio to the castles in the clouds.
  2. Be grateful. Gratitude is all about appreciation. Realize that you don’t always need more, but appreciate what you already have. Life is never complete (until you become a zombie, then it’s a new life) so embrace this idea of being thankful. If you can begin to accept that you’re OK with what you have right now, but still realize that many more possibilities are eating in your future, you create a whole new feeling of personal validation. If we were given everything all at once, there would be nothing to strive for, and therefore no personal growth. Practice being mindful (I know, my word flavor of the month) and thankful at the same time. Remember to stay hungry though, so you’ll be ready to embrace the future when it knocks on your happy, grateful door.
  3. In every ending there is a new beginning. TowerbeginsSometimes, you just need to walk away. It was necessary for me and my family to close up shop and change direction, if only to realize that we were missing out on all that good stuff, especially the kids. We ended an era of owning our own company, and now have a  new beginning. I’m not sure about the next chapter of our lives, or that the current part is so amazing, but life can be surprising. I’m sure when we get the chance to turn the page, it will be incredible.
  4. Think of your current struggles as growing pains. Imagine RootsDragons have a song called Roots; and the chorus blatantly states “I know it’s gotta go like this, I know – Hell will always come before you grow,” so even they realize that nothing  worth having comes easy.  Simple things like happiness, success and love all have a price. Sometimes you get knocked down, flat out on your back, but you dust yourself off and get up. Even stuck in a hamster wheel of a rut, you know deep down that circumstances will change. Sometimes, you need to hit roak bottom to know you can rise again and be proactive and positive.
  5. Use what you have, we all were created with a body, gifted with a creative mind and the breath of life. Use your body to change your state of mind. Those of you who read me know I’ve taken up meditation. As a new student (ok, not so new, just dense) I am learning to breathe and recognize signals in my body that indicate stress and how to breathe to relax myself. It’s a little mental adjustment that lets me see a little more clearly. Cats and dogs have the right idea, wen you feel good (and lazy and comfortable) you attitude is happy and content. Remember, good things happen more frequently for positive people.

In summation, (I feel like a lawyer) I want to remind you that it’s all about…yes…yes…mindfulness! Relax, clear the clutter, minimize and focus on the positive. You may not be able to control fate, but you can control how you respond to life and unforeseen events. Remember that you can always control some facets of you life, your friends, your attitude…don’t neglect these for the things beyond your grasp. Choose your friends, words and daily extra happies (like that chocolate treat, or unexpected movie or something like that.) choose how you respond to adversity. Choose to keep a positive attitude. Happy people are successful people. Or they write caffeinated motivational blog posts for you! 😂☕️

What motivates you to stay positive in the face of disaster? Share your life, share your drama. We happy folk here will send glittery hugs and caffeinated kisses.

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8 Comments

  1. Hey! I like your blog! Our family (except for my husband who feels icky in crowds) studied mindfulness meditation at a Buddhist temple for a while. It was awesome! The nuns there were excellent teachers. It made me more relaxed, patient, and able to let things go, because I was more in control of my thoughts.

    We stopped going when their attempts to convert us (Catholics) became one of the stresses we were trying to control!

    So nice to read your motivational thoughts. Nice seeing you somewhere besides Prose. 8D

    • Sometimes I need to work in that letting go, but we are all works in progress! See you on Prose! ☕️

  2. I really need to work on the focus portion! Without it I find myself stuck often. Thanks for the help!

  3. It can be a challenge when you are stuck to get unstuck. 😀 Keep up the great work here and live unstoppable.

  4. Great post! Two of my favorites are being grateful and thinking of tough times as growing pains! Always helps me to shift my focus instead of wallowing.

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