Is Hurricane Matthew as Exciting as a Zombie Apocalypse?

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Zombie Apocalypse VS Cat 4 Hurricane pix by weknowyourdreams.com
Zombie Apocalypse VS Cat 4 Hurricane
pix by weknowyourdreams.com

Alright people on the Eastern Seaboard in the Southern hemisphere of the US of A…get ready to be bushwhacked! Is it a flaming fireball? Zombies? Nope. People all over the globe (OK probably only where there’s a chance of being affected) are watching that Vipir radar and logging onto NOAA to track this big ball of hot air. OK, maybe it’s more than just hot air, winds at over 130 MPH and a touch of fatalistic apocalyptic surrealism. So, I bring to you today, lucky readers, my recap of the last two days from the Sunshine State, yup, that’s right Florida. And yes, the east coast is going to get slammed, how much? Well, that’s up to Mother Nature right now.

I am writing this late Wednesday afternoon. If you read Tuesday’s post, you know that I spent the last couple of days praying for my soul, and for health, happiness and the whole shebang. I guess I forgot to pray for that Florida sunshine. I usually go grocery shopping on Thursdays, but, not this week. Having been through a couple of Cat 3 or 4 hurricanes in the 20+ years I’ve lived here, I know better than to overstock. Some bottled water, nonperishables, lanterns, and enough petrol to get the heck out of Dodge once the storm blows over. Alright, maybe that’s oversimplified, but you get the picture. Not so for Boca today.

Remember you need 3 days supply for each member of your household. Don't forget your pets!
Remember you need 3 days supply for each member of your household. Don’t forget your pets!

This morning, I had the lovely occasion to venture out to the market. The first indication of doom were the gas lines. Blocking the main roads in Boca, it was difficult to navigate, but I made my way bravely to the store. I was in search of a loaf of bread (we were all out) and some of those lunchbox, non-refrigerated milk boxes – for the kids, you know, just in case. WOW! People are hoarding, running, stocking up like the zombie apocalypse is upon us! You were able to tell the natives and the seasoned veterans of the multitude of hurricanes that have passed through South Florida, by the small amount of food in their baskets. We all had a good laugh over some of the non-experienced, and I do apologize, right now, just in case any of you happen to be reading this.

First, to the girl in the hot pink stripe yoga leggings – if there is a power out, the microwave will NOT work. Nor can you “plug in” a grill to cook. So all those lean cuisines and fresh meats and veggies you bought this morning? Better eat them all when the storm begins.

To the boy scout with a camping stove and the cart overflowing with Maruchen – good for you! Though I dare say that after being fueled by ramen for a few days to a couple of weeks, you may be sorry you didn’t opt for the peanut butter and crackers.

To the lady who wanted to know if pizza was a good idea…honestly sweetie, think about that for just one second. And your friend buying the 15 bags of ice? She told you she wasn’t sure where she was putting them. My goodness people – it’s a storm. An inconvenience for sure, but not the apocalypse. The world is not ending this weekend. (I hope)

So yes, I’m a hurricane veteran. Been through Frances and Jeanne in 2004. Hubby was driving home from the office, saw two tornadoes off of 95. One lifted a car straight up, and plonked it down two lanes over. Luckily, there was only some shock, no injuries. We shuttered the house and hunkered down. The kids were still young enough to enjoy having the living room and the den littered with outside toys. They had their own Monkey Joe’s as the jungle gym, battery powered jeep and motorcycle and other fun toys came inside. They were amused for hours. We ate a ton of crap, yes, I know, but hurricanes call for Yodels, Ring Dings and Oreos, followed with the forbidden soda and a LOT of chocolate. Needless to say, I had little jumping beans for a while. Lots of fun to watch. During the eye of the storm, the kids splashed in “Lake Furst,” at the end of our dipped driveway. I can’t remember them laughing so hard since. But, inside was dark. And when the power went off, it was hot and humid. Luckily, my mom and in-laws had power, and we shuffled between them for the few weeks we were down. Yes, I said weeks. Once our grid went up, Jeanne came sweeping through, and took back the power and felled my tree breaking a water main. But, we survived, and cleaned up, and moved on.

Wilma came for a blustery visit in 2005, and we were in our new home. No shutters, but that was OK. We spent the holiday celebrating in the nearest nursing home, who kindly offered us the use of their lobby and social hall since they had a generator. But the streets were pitch black at night. We lost our screened enclosure (a pretty good thing in the end) and the power. For nearly 2 weeks. We were grilling everything! I boiled water for my essential morning beans, and we grilled steaks for the neighbors. Didn’t really seem too bad this time around.

Now, onto Matthew. This bad boy is destined to strike tomorrow evening. Probably pouring down and blowing up around me while you’re reading this. Though I don’t have my heavy bat to beat off the zombies, I am prepared for everything else. The animals have food, we have food and water and Gatorade. I have Band-Aids and blankets and lanterns and my handy crank radio. This too shall pass. And if I lose power again? Well, it happens, but I’m heading for the hills. Everyone loves a road trip, especially if it involves AC and cold food.

Radar Pix - wpbf.com
Radar Pix – wpbf.com

So my friends, those of you in the line of fire, stay safe. If you see the walking dead – run the other way. They probably want your storm supplies. And remember- even though it’s serious and scary, you can still make the best of every moment with your loved ones. So hunker down, I’m ready. The Devil Dogs and candy await. Be safe.

As always, stay motivated and caffeinated!😉☕

Bonus track – I think this is appropriate here:

 

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4 Comments

  1. Love the 80’s song. Prepare for the worst and hope for the best. Let’s hope that most people listen and evacuate and very few people are hurt.

  2. Happy that we did not get impacted by the storm, hope everyone North of here is safe. Our hearts go out to the people living in the Caribbean and especially to the nation of Haiti.

  3. This post was written in advance of the Hurricane. I am saddened by all of the deaths and injuries and loss of properties to all those affected. My heart goes out to everyone who was impacted by Hurricane Matthew, and this article was never meant to be anything more than an entertaining op-ed piece.

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