Let’s be brutally honest. Talk to your heart, use your mind. We have all acted in toxic ways over time, in damaging, devastating ways that push people away. Sometimes those we wish to keep close. Toxicity can ruin relationships, careers, and your own personal well-being. None of us are immune to toxic behavior, but learning to be mindful and aware can make you more wholesome, healthy and kind.
Whether or not venomous, noxious behaviors are commonplace in your life, it is crucial for your own happiness and success to recognize when you’re behaving badly, and mindfully shift your thoughts when they surface.
Let’s talk about some very common toxic behaviors. I bet you’ll recognize some of these in yourself. Be brave. Once we are aware of our deficits, it becomes super easy to change these habits. I promise you’ll be happier and more at peace with yourself.
I am truly guilty of this first one : taking everything just a tad too personally. Certain events have occurred throughout my life, and often I feel that things happening around me are a direct attack. It isn’t an ego thing- I just genuinely feel under the microscope and under assault. But, I am learning to step back, use mindful practices to be aware, and to deflect these feelings. The truth is that what others say and do reflects them and their stigmas, not mine. People react with their own perspectives and experiences. It doesn’t matter if people think you’re amazing, or believe you’re the devil incarnate – it’s more about them. I’m not saying we should ignore all feedback, but too much of our hurt, disappointments and sadness come from taking things personally. It’s much healthier to let go of others’ opinions of you, and to operate using your own heart, intuition and wisdom as your guide to life.
Another toxic behavior is acting like you’re always a victim. I call it the martyr syndrome. Believing you’re a victim, that you have no power in the direction of your life, is a toxic attitude that makes you stuck. In my classes, I am learning that humans have access to far more power, authority, and influence over our own lives than we believe. So stop whining, and refuse to see yourself as a victim.
Along these same lines, is the need for constant validation. People who get caught up in the need to prove their value time and time again are toxic. And they are draining. I’m sure we can all think of a few people like this. “Over-worry” (yeah, I think I mad that up) about how things have to look to others can wear you out. There is a bigger picture to life, and it isn’t about perceived success to society. It’s all about the journey; what you’re learning, how you help others, and the growing process you need to let yourself participate in.
Many of us struggle with some or all of these behaviors. Don’t fret- you’re not alone. Each of us need to pull deep from within, to be mindful and feel better, to be able to think more clearly, and to get our lives back on track. And we will all succeed at our own pace. It’s your move.♞
Stay Motivated and Caffeinated!😉☕